Movie: Men Who Stare At Goats

Let me start off by saying this movie was so slowly paced that I nearly fell asleep. George Clooney plays (again) a strange main character role in order to get the viewer to watch. Its sad when you have to bring in a big name to get someone to watch your lame movie. Either case, lets move on to what the movie is about. The premise is about a journalist who learns after meeting Clooney that the U.S government went through a "Hippy Reformation" as I will call it, during the 70s. The reformation was called "The New Earth Army"lead by a leader hippy who convinced the army that they were an elite group of men that possessed strenth in kindness and convinced them they could obtain super powers like 'cloud shifting' or walking though walls . These 'Jedi Knights' as they came to be called were the beginning to a new era in war. Clooney was a close follower of the leader hippy and was (or so he thought) able to be invisible, travel the world with his mind and lets not forget: Kill a goat by staring at it. A huge portion of the 'movement' was lead by LSD. The movie overall was a bomb. I laughed twice during its duration and honestly couldn't wait for the next movie to play. The movie interrogates your mind ~making you wonder, can they really have super powers? Did they or was it the drugs? And Why am I still watching this? Among the flashes of unnecessary scenes of animal abuse and torment, poorly scripted lines and a screen full of desert for a couple hours, I would call this movie a fail...right under Burn After Reading. The best part? The huge LSD trip scene. I think that was the second laugh I had...and last. Overall movie score: 2 for a barely tangible plot and a poor use of film time.

Movie: The Jane Austen Book Club

This film could easily be summed up in one word; satifying. When six random people find themselves in a book club, an unlikely plot for a movie mind you, personal stories from each individual unravel and are slowly knitted together in the end. If you don't mind me being frank, the movie is a bit cheesy, for lack of a better term. It's an enjoyable cheesy on the contrary. I was easily swept up in the complication's of each of the characters, rooting them on or yelling at them to make a different decision. I am usually one to judge a movie by its overall typicality, this one sheds a new light on how life should be handled; with care. This would be a film to watch on a rainy day with a bowl of popcorn and good friends around, that is for sure. It is a bit lengthy however, much resembling that of Jane Austen's books. I'd suggest having some knowledge of her books before watching this film, it will keep you on track with the plot and it parallels to Jane's books. Overall I'd rate this film an 8.5 out of 10. Satisfying.

Movie: Dan in Real Life

This film may not be the typical love story I am used to; on the contrary the ending is rather cliche and rather rushed. The plot is rather simple, but creative. Dan (Steve Correll) meets a woman named Anne-Marie at a bookstore and at his family gathering finds out she's his brother's girlfriend. So the trouble ensues when they have fallen for eachother but do not want to humiliate the family. He's a widow and has three girls; two teenagers and one fourth grader. Throughout the film he faces the reality that he has fallen for his brother's girlfriend whom he (the brother) adores mind you, and battling with the fact his eldest daughters are resenting him for treating them as young children. I like that this movie is practical, it's easily a realistic plot. I feel it could have been more believable however, say if the two had been high school or college sweet hearts before Dan's marriage to his now deceased wife. The pair continuously find themselves in awkward scenarios which is comical, but rubs the wrong way, giving a slight sense of cheap flirtation despite his brother's love towards Marie. Now here come the throw backs. The mother tends to favor Dan's brother more than Dan, which honestly is rather threatening to me. Perhaps because Dan is depressed during the film, it seems he should be the pittied character. He never smiles, basically comes depressed and remains that way till the last five minutes of the movie. I feel there should have been more sympathy towards him and less feeling of abandonment. However Steve Correll acts well in this movie, I prefer him in this role as compared to "The Office." So for a good just-barely-there heart warming film, give this one a try. Rating: 7.8 out of 10.

Movie: Surf's Up

Now everyone loves a little penguin movie, right? This one took a peculiar turn, sadly almost as boring as the television show, Creature Comforts. The entire movie revolves around a penguin named Cody Maverick (Shia LaBeouf), his great admiration for "Z" the best surfing penguin that ever lived and his abnormality in his own society in Antarctica. I find myself being turned off by Shia's voice and personality for the film. In every film he has acted in, from "I, Robot" to "Transformers," he's always trying to fight to be treated like a man. Either case, in "Surf's Up", Cody is followed by a camera crew for a "behind-the-scenes" perspective throughout the entire movie, I found this to be a huge aggravation. The camera crew interviews everyone that knows Cody. Basically its an eighty-five minute interview; spare me and let me watch one with Barbara Walters and Joe the Plumber. On the bright side the animation is brilliant, far surpassing those of only five years ago. At least there are characters that are relatively comical like the chicken named Chicken Joe (Jon Heder) who is the cliche version of a California surfer and a sandpiper bird that eventually "shows he has a heart." The writers of this film obviously found it hilarious to add a few references to shows like "I Dream of Jeannie," however I found it dry. A child would surely enjoy this movie, but what don't they enjoy? As an adult, don't expect to be too entertained. Rating: 4.5 out of 10.

First Movie Review: Burn After Reading

Three Comments; Bad Acting, Ugly People, Ridonculous Plot. Don't get me started on how this movie was by far the worst movie I have ever seen. The movie literally revolves around a self-absorbed...or shall I say...obsessed personal trainer named Linda Litzke (Frances McDormand) who wants four cosmetic surgeries but her Insurance refuses to pay for it. When Chad Feldheimer (Brad Pitt), her co-worker at Hard Bodies gym finds a CD with a memoir of a random CIA lunatic named Osbourne Cox (John Malkovich) whom neither of them know, things start rolling down hill from there. One pathetic plot trip after another, characters consenquently get killed over this CD, while everyone is tied together through some misfortune or affair. My first problem with this film is it's very existence. The second however being that good actors were put to a pathetic waste for a sorry monologue and plot. The other issue I have is that aside from the two great actors (Brad Pitt and George Clooney) the rest were negatively attractive (ugly) and had horrible personalities. If I were to rate this movie between a 1 and 10, It would be a -10. Without a doubt, dont waste your time.